Monday, June 20, 2011

TOS - Vol 3, Part 1, Chapter 5

The Overlord Saga
Vol III. The Armageddon Prophecy

Chapter 5: The Start of the End




The Overlord was painfully disappointed by the lack of excitement in the temple. She had, at first, entered with extreme caution, recalling events from Indiana Jones and National Treasure. If she had much knowledge concerning temples and ancient structures, it was all based on several things- don't touch the idol in the center of the room, don't step on any strange tiles on the floor, and keep an eye out for large boulders that might come crashing down onto you. However, within the first ten minutes of exploration, it became painfully obvious that this shrine was unarmed and unprotected by any booby traps, giant boulders, stone warriors, or even snakes. And for this, she was disappointed.

There was actually not much in the temple, not even a mountain of gold to horde back to the Fortress. Everything was overrun with vines and shrubs. The floor was beginning to deteriorate, leaving chunks in the stone floor where plants had started to spring up. The Overlord noted the ivy that clung to the pillars supporting the roof. She noted the lack of windows, and the pictures that decorated the walls. They were of the same things. The boar, the shark, the bird. For a moment, she considered that these animals were important, then completely disregarded that theory as it sounded preposterous. After all, there wasn't much sacred about a giant, tusked pig.

... Or was there?

A flicker of doubt, and the Overlord caught a glimpse of where the Soul-Keeper stood, in front of a large tablet at the far end of the room. The Overlord checked her mental handbook on 'Really, Really Old Places That Probably Are Mystical", silently reading off the rules in her head. The line of logic went as follows:


1. If it's important, it's in the middle of the room.
- If it is not in the middle of the room, then it is large, obvious, and in the back of the room.


There was a glance at the middle of the room. There was nothing. She looked at the back of the room. The tablet was the center of interest here. She stepped up alongside the Soul-Keeper, looking at the tablet in interest.

"Whatcha reading?" the Overlord asked the Soul-Keeper casually.

"I don't know, but the pictures are pretty!" the Soul-Keeper remarked giddily.

"Let's see if we can make this into a story..." the Overlord squinted, looking at the tablet. "There's a man here." She pointed at the beginning, "He has a sword. He's... All tough and powerful looking. And, oh look, are these his pets?" She pointed to a trio of animals- the boar, the eagle, the shark. The next image was of the man in serious combat with all three beasts, "I... Nevermind." It looks like a kid drew this, the Theurgist remarked. The Overlord continued, "He's beaten them all, and..." She frowned, looking at the image ensuing the man's victory. She couldn't tell what it was, but it looked suspiciously like a door.

"So nosy of Firebrand, to be here," a voice hissed, and the Overlord swung around, grabbing at the hilt of her scythe. When she saw that it was Maverick, she stopped, shooting the hunched over figure an annoyed look.

"Oh! Oh! Oh, oh, oh, I FOUND her!" the Soul-Keeper bounced up and down, "I found her, Overlord!"

"I see that," the Overlord said evenly.

Maverick cackled, hobbling forward, "Ye have founds the Ruins of Armageddon," she observed with a wry smile, "Built ages before, dares Maverick speak it? Ages before even Maverick existed." A strange of black hair could be seen drifting out from under the hood- the wisp of a set of bangs.

"Ruins of Armageddon? Like... the thing from the Bible?" the Overlord asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Armageddon is in many religions, faiths, and beliefs. Not all named Armageddon, though. All named other things. Ragnorak, that is a name Maverick hears from old, strong men, thinking they know more than even mountains. Mountains know all, Firebrand knows?" Maverick inquired, pointing upwards with a finger. The Overlord, who had been lost at the first sentence, merely nodded a few times, feeling incredibly dumb. Maverick laughed boisterously at this.

"Uhm, so... You know what the tablet says, I guess...?" the Soul-Keeper pointed over his shoulder at the large slab of stone.

Maverick inclined her head, "But will Maverick teach him tales, I wonder? Yes... Wonder, indeed," She murmured. "Perhaps if you give Maverick a chicken, Maverick will tell you?"

"Or I could not tell the Order where you are. That would be a better bargain," the Overlord retorted.

"And yet, Maverick sees much irony in that statement," Maverick remarked, enjoying the Overlord's slight bristle in defense. She played with a strand of hair, then continued babbling, "Chicken or no, Maverick tells what is happening. Sees Rift, yes? Cannot see the bottom, yes? Wonders what lies in the shadow of the ditch, does Firebrand not? Well, now, but only now, there is soil! Layers upon layers, but soon, no more layers will there be!"

"English?" the Overlord asked impatiently.

"Maverick tells Firebrand now. Firebrand has much to be concerned about. For when the Rift hath cracked to Between's core, then shall more than fire rise up from the abyss," Maverick said very seriously, "The Lord of Darkness bears more armies than feet upon a centipede."

"That's a lot of feet," the Soul-Keeper stammered.

"The Lord of Darkness? Are you trying to tell me that Satan is going to burst through the Rift?" the Overlord scoffed.

"Him and more. The Gates of Hell, yes... Those are to open when Armageddon has reached its climax. When the beasts of old begin their march to devour and destroy, Firebrand! That is when the Enemy returns to claim Eden. To claim paradise. And Life," Maverick hissed angrily.

"I... What," the Overlord said, blinking several times.

"Oh my goodness..." the Soul-Keeper frowned, "Did she just say that-"

"The world will end," the Maverick finished deftly.

"But it's not 2012 yet!" the Overlord argued.

"Destiny never waits," Maverick pointed a finger at the tablet, "And fate is never a good neighbor! Only the Chosen One of the Armageddon Prophecy can stop the tides of change and prevent the Enemy from his returning!"

"And, let me guess... I get to be the Chosen One, because I found the stupid temple and luck is never on my side?" the Overlord remarked, rubbing her forehead.

Maverick grinned from ear-to-ear, "To be told destiny never makes the story as good, yes? Be warned... Firebrand, the Enemy knows the face of his destroyer. And he will try to end his rival before he can be stopped."

"Are you kidding me? We have three large monsters tearing the world apart, and, oh, by the way, you get to deal with the armies of Hell trying to assassinate you? That's so awesome. I think I just won the 'Best Year Ever' award," the Overlord scowled, arms folded.

"So, does this mean we're all gonna die?" the Soul-Keeper whimpered. "We can't let them kill the world. I like the world..."

"Hm. Heaven itself unleashes the monsters. Authority would be needed for Armageddon. Perhaps way to contact angels is needed," Maverick frowned.

"Gabriel!" the Overlord declared loudly.

"He's still in the Dungeon!" the Soul-Keeper gasped, hands over his mouth. He then allowed himself a giggle, "He's chained up."

"That's creepy," the Overlord shot a look at the Soul-Keeper.

"Find why monsters have been released. Maverick's eyes can see that this... Rift, world destruction, monsters to devour mankind- dark events. Not something angels would do. Not now," Maverick frowned.

"Ugh, this is so confusing," the Overlord snorted, "Okay. I'm going to go back to my Fortress now. I think I need to make a few business calls..."

"Business calls are important," the Soul-Keeper nodded. "Can we stop for orange chicken?"

"As long as I get a Tao tea while we're at it. I need something," the Overlord mumbled, massaging her temples.

"See you at large stone castle, Maverick will. Sent for help, Maverick has," Maverick bowed to both the hooded Soul-Keeper and the dark-clad Overlord before vanishing in a puff of smoke.

"Help...?" the Overlord asked, then frowned. I don't want to get everyone riled up if we can easily stop this... But... There's no telling what the next few months are going to be like if we're going to be running around trying to fight Hell's soldiers. What do Hell's forces even LOOK like? Ugh... Never mind, I don't wanna know. It's probably a bunch of spiders. Big, hairy spiders.

---

The Evocator, the Animal Tamer, and the Apprentice were all within the Overlord's office by the time that the Overlord and the Soul-Keeper had returned. The Overlord had no idea where the Ninja-Lord had snuck off to, but suspected she was scampering somewhere around the walls with the rest of her squadron. The Advisor, according to the Animal Tamer, was off in the armory attempting to put her machine gun back together. Apparently, it had been dismantled (the Overlord had known about this in advance, but had sworn to Brainsucker and TCUE that she would not tell on them). She stifled a smile as the Animal Tamer finished her report on the new animal soldiers. The Animal Tamer had been constructing armor for Nard alongside the new Papillon Guerilla Force Squad (PGFS), and was proud to have finished the prototype.

Once the Animal Tamer had stepped back from the desk, the Apprentice stood up proudly, "I have a problem." The Overlord fought a sadistic laugh, and listening on to her underling. "I keep having these weird dreams about not wearing pants. And I have hamburger cravings. I think it's because of that stupid stuff you make us drink when we join the army! I think I'm allergic!"

"You've been an Underling for how long?" the Overlord asked, raising her eyebrows. "I'm sure you're fine."

"Maybe you're pregnant," the Soul-Keeper giggled.

"Well, she resides in your dungeon. Who do you think would be the father?" the Overlord shot an accusing look at the Soul-Keeper.

"I... Uh... Uh... GABRIEL!" the Soul-Keeper proclaimed loudly, his voice the epitome of disgust and shock.

"That's what I thought," the Overlord rolled her eyes. "Evocator, you're up next. And please let this be something relevant."

The Evocator stood up as the Apprentice sat back down in her chair. She cleared her throat, then held out what looked like an invitation. Taking it cautiously, the Overlord cocked an eyebrow, "This is from the SVC." Her single jade eye flicked to the Evocator for an answer.

There was a shrug, "I found this earlier today. TCUE had it. He was gonna set it on fire. Brainsucker wasn't doing anything to help either. There's a party at the SVC today."

"Brilliant."

"You're available?"

"As per usual."

"Wonderful. It's at 8:00 p.m."

"Superb."

"Lex will be there."

There was that moment where the Overlord recalled the previous events from that day. The image of the shark, the boar, and the eagle came to mind in such a flurry that it stunned her silent for a moment. There were the Maverick's words in her ears- distant echoes that only grew louder and louder with each ticking of the clock. The Overlord's hands dug into the sides of her desk and she gritted her teeth together. Lex- he was the sort of fellow to take a clump of salt and shove it into a wound. No, it was worse than that. He was the sort of guy to strip you down naked, cover you in papercuts, then dump you in a bathtub full of Germ-X. He was an unwanted nuisance. A conversation with him would throw her off the edge... Perhaps not as much as merely seeing Jester again, but it was still annoying- all of his formalities and under-handed compliments. That, matched with his absolute baldness, the shininess of his head, just drove her insane. She wanted to rub his head, damn it, but he'd never let her. Just one rub. Just to see if it squeaked. But no, this was how it would all go, and she saw the scenario playing in her head: Lex would ramble on about nothing, she would want to rub his head, someone would start talking about Darth Vader's betrayal, there would probably be a Voldemort impersonator, and she just couldn't deal with those kinds of politics.

"Never mind, that's during my.... ahem.... underwater basket-weaving class," the Overlord shook her head.

"You're going. Wear a cape," the Evocator folded her arms.

"You wear a cape," the Overlord stood up, "I'm not going. There's actually another matter I need to address. Privately, so, if you wouldn't mind kindly departing from my office, I need to make a call to the big guns upstairs. If you catch my drift."

"I thought we were the big guns upstairs?" the Apprentice asked in confusion.

"Bigger guns," the Overlord clarified. She urged them all but the Soul-Keeper from her office, then collapsed into her desk chair. The Soul-Keeper began making tea, whistling something from Gypsy as he was doing so. The Overlord summoned a ball of fire, then began playing with it, "I don't know why I'm forced to put up with this sort of nonsense, Soul-Keeper."

"Because it's funny?" the Soul-Keeper poured her a glass of tea, then began sipping his drink happily.

The Overlord wordlessly tossed the ball of fire into a nearby bush near the window. She watched as the shrub burned, but did not wither and die away. Instead, the ringing of a telephone could be heard. She rubbed her forehead as she listened, taking in a deep breath and exhaling loudly.

"Yes, is this the Overlord?" a deep voice answered, resonating from the bush.

"Yes, is this Metatron?" the Overlord asked, "I've a certain matter I need to discuss with you."

"Yes."

"So, why exactly did you release the monsters to eat the world? That's kind of uncool."

"Excuse me?"

"Shark. Bird. Piggy. Don't you remember that at all?"

"Are you referring to Leviathan, Ziz, and Behemoth?"

"Sure, whatever. I heard you released them. There's even this giant crack right outside my house. What the heck, man?"

There was a long drawn-out silence. The Overlord tapped her pen impatiently, waiting for an answer. But then, a strange thought occurred to her. It was something along the lines of 'it doesn't really make sense to randomly end the world now' and 'for being one of the head angels, he really has no idea what his people are doing'. And that thought inevitably led to, 'I don't think he knew that the world was ending'. Which, then, led to, 'wow, these people are as ill-informed as the American public on Congressional matters'.

"... We didn't release the Beasts of Armageddon, Overlord," Metatron said quietly. "I've just been informed that they've escaped. No one knows how-"

"Oh, so that's cool. The world's just gonna end because someone in your organization SCREWED UP?" the Overlord held up her hands in frustration. The Soul-Keeper cackled in the background, snickering as he slurped on his iced tea. The Overlord scowled, "No matter that hundreds of people are going to die or anything because of this..."

"Well, the world isn't a great place," Metatron said defensively, "God gave them knowledge of chemistry and physics, and what does humanity do? They come up with a backwards cape. That's just pathetic. We give them brilliant singers, and they waste their time on Miley Montana, or whatnot, and that Key-dollar-uh girl... I don't understand. Why not the Beatles? What is wrong with the Beatles?"

She didn't understand. World wasn't a great place- so what? It never HAD been. Backwards capes? So what if humanity was stupid. She also didn't understand the angel's fascination with the Beatles. But that seemed beside the point. All of it seemed 'beside the point'. "That sounds like a plethora of excuses, sir," the Overlord growled. "I don't know if you realize what this-"

"Oh, we do realize, and we apologize. But the monsters cannot be captured. Not again. So, it appears as though you're out of luck," Metatron snapped back angrily.

"I don't think hope's completely lost," the Overlord sneered, "There has to be a way to make up for YOUR mistake, am I correct?" How she hated pawns like him. How she loathed the minions that knew nothing but laziness and loopholes. It was due to cronies like this one that nothing ever got done. The Overlord prided herself in owning a very hard-working force of soldiers, and, perhaps though the troops were not currently at their best, the recent war with DIB had reinforced her belief that she still retained the best troops in the Between.

"What are you more concerned about, Overlord? The fact that these monsters will destroy the world, or that your contract will have expired when they're finished ending the world?" Metatron asked scathingly.

"WHAT?!" the Overlord shouted, rising from her desk. A thousand whirs of thoughts were zooming about her mind, clustering her thoughts and preventing her from seeing straight. The Soul-Keeper rose to catch her as she swayed on her feet, and she latched onto his shoulder with a hand, her single visible eye narrowed until it was a serpentine slit.

"You heard me," there was a definite tone of snarkiness in the angel's voice, "You can't take and keep souls if there's no Earth. No Life. No Death. Just a blended existence. One plane, one world. Did you think your reign in the Between would last forever?"

And that was one of the only times the Overlord could actually remember being so furious that she could not speak.


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