TOS - Vol 2, Pt 3, Ch 29

The Overlord Saga

Vol II. Versus

Chapter 29: Dynamic Duo

Traveling north had been no easy task. Due to the massive amount of dragons set as guards by DIB, the group had been forced to warp from the Insurgents’ Forest to the far side of the mountains, putting them dangerously close to the conflict between the ANF and DIB at Fort Effort. Though the Overlord knew she longed to fight the DIB forces stationed there, she had led the group as far away from the battle as she could muster, though she knew that they, too, wanted to see how their companions were faring. The craggy, red-stoned mountains provided an abundance of cover, but their food supply were rather lacking. Still, that didn’t mean that they were starving (though the Soul-Keeper probably thought otherwise). It helped to talk about something different... So, the group talked to fill the silence and their emptiness of their stomachs.

“So, how did you get him to switch sides?” Sexist asked as the Overlord pulled herself onto a particularly odd-shaped rock formation that blocked their trail. She glanced down at him, still unable to make eye-contact with the ex-DIB soldier.

“The usual,” she swung her other leg over, sitting comfortably on a flatter portion of the rock formation, “The deep talk about nothing. Y’know...” She slid down a ways, “Making metaphors and using big words to sound like I knew what I was saying,” She landed on the other side, offering a hand to help the Advisor down, “And bluffing. Can’t forget the bluffing. Lots of bluffing.”

“Bluffing? So you tricked him?” Sexist asked, landing next to the Overlord, who promptly began moving away from him, down the rusty path.

“Not quite. Just a lot of acting. That’s all there is to being evil, really. Acting like you know what you’re doing. Making plans that never really seem to work out. Tack on an evil laugh to it, and there you go,” the Overlord waved a hand, “Real evil geniuses don’t have time to be emotionally disturbed.” She tossed an elbow into the Theurgist’s ghost as he cleared his throat rather loudly.

“So where is this... Swordmaster?” the Grasshopper asked, “And why haven’t I met him before if he’s so important?”

“Because he’s her ex-boyfriend,” the Advisor remarked rather plainly.

“Ouch, okay... Not a good thing to be bringing up...” the Overlord looked over her shoulder at the Advisor. “Actually, I’ll be the only one doing the talking. Wouldn’t want certain people...,” Insert pointed look at the Soul-Keeper, “... To ruin our chances of recruiting one of the best katana-wielders in the history of... Well... everything.”

“So he’s good at fighting with a katana?” the Grasshopper asked.

“You could even call him awesome,” the Overlord inclined her head, then hopped up a few ledges, clearly performing some gravity manipulation as she pulled herself up onto a higher pathway. Glancing down at the others, she added, “I haven’t seen him in ages, though. But he should be around here somewhere.”

“Does your ex-boyfriend-,” the Soul-Keeper began, but was cut off.

“-The SWORDMASTER-,” the Overlord corrected rather pointedly.

“-have a bathroom?” the Soul-Keeper asked innocently.

There was silence that ensued for a moment. Sexist pulled himself up another ledge, panting heavily under the setting sun. The Grasshopper nimbly passed him, joining her mentor. “I’m sure he does,” the Overlord answered awkwardly, then began over the ridge of the mountain, careful not to slide down the slope. Grabbing ahold of a rock, she steadied herself, before hopping down to a lower path on the opposite side of the ridge from where they’d been traveling.

“What if he’s not even around here? We could be searching for days,” the Advisor complained.

“I’m the Overlord. No one eludes the Overlord,” the Overlord retorted, leaning against her staff thoughtfully. As the Soul-Keeper came sliding down the slope to join them, his robe got caught on a nearby tree and tore partially, revealing a pasty-white thigh. The Overlord grimaced, holding up a hand to shield her apprentice’s eyes. Sexist merely facepalmed.

The Grasshopper pulled away from her mentor, stubbornly giving a shrug and walking towards a large tree that stuck out oddly from the side of the mountain. As she reached the midway point from the rest of the group and the tree, she felt the ground beneath her weaken with a crack, then give way. Sucking in her breath in horror, the Grasshopper plummeted downward, unsure if she could even scream. Shouts rang in her ears, but she swore it was the Overlord’s. Landing with a thud onto the cold, hard surface of a cave, the Grasshopper’s vision dimmed temporarily, her head spinning as she pushed herself up into a sitting position. Senses jarred, she could barely tell anything about the cave... Except that she wasn’t alone and could feel eyes watching her.

“Overl-” she began to cry out in fright as the tip of a curved sword touched the bottom of her chin lightly, lifting her face to meet the dark eyes of an armor-clad warrior, who vaguely resembled a ninja.

“Sh,” the warrior hissed in a short wisp of air. Eyes flicking up, the warrior made a half-step back as something came barreling downwards, colliding into him, then propelling away. The Overlord helped the Grasshopper to her feet with one hand, the free one clutching Kagi tightly. Sexist was the second one down the hole and into the cave, thudding next to the Overlord with his claymore drawn. The Soul-Keeper came next, then the Advisor, machine gun drawn.

“This lot looks a tad familiar,” a second voice chimed from the shadows, a red dot placed on the Overlord’s forehead- most likely from a sniper rifle. The Overlord’s breath was shallow, quick, yet quiet, her eyes darting around the cave. An orb of fire exploded in her hand, and she held it up to reveal the two strangers in the cave.

The armored warrior, who actually was not very much taller than the Overlord herself, was backed up by a man in some futuristic looking armor, dual belts crossing before his chest, and shoulder plates marking some odd uniform. He carried a rifle in one arm, but seemed to bear many firearms, a bazooka strapped to his back as well. While the sword-bearing warrior wore a helmet, his companion did not, letting his longer brown hair blow in the stale breeze.

“Swordmaster. Corporal,” the Overlord remarked rather lightly, “Good to see you.”

“Oh. Found them!” the Grasshopper said a little too late.

“This is the Swordmaster?” Sexist asked, gesturing at the helmed warrior. As the Swordmaster took his helmet off and stepped closer into the light, several blades strapped to his limbs and back could be seen- though he seemed to favor the katana out of all of the other swords.

“And who are you supposed to be?” the Swordmaster scoffed at Sexist, looking him over with his dark brown eyes. Glancing at the Overlord, he frowned, then commented, “Barging in unannounced... You haven’t changed much.”

“I could say the same to you,” the Overlord retorted, an immediate tension overwhelming the cave. She noted as her companions backed away to give her and the Swordmaster some room, though she turned her attention to the Corporal, flashing him a delighted smile, “Corporal Woodson, it’s good to see you again.”

The Corporal responded by shouldering his rifle, returning a large smile, “Overlord. You haven’t grown an inch!”

“Funny,” the Overlord couldn’t help but chuckle, sheathing her katana and folding her arms, “I suppose you boys know why I’m here...”

“I’ll say it probably has to do with why there’s a random group of soldiers running around and conquering everything,” the Swordmaster nodded, sword sheathed as he looked at where the Soul-Keeper was hopping around with his legs angled inward awkwardly. With a sigh, he pointed over his shoulder, “Bathroom is the first door on the left.”

“THANK YOU SO MUCH!” the Soul-Keeper exclaimed, then began running in the direction mentioned.

“The Dark Ice Brotherhood has massed an army stronger than any I have ever owned. And so I’m asking for aid. From friends. Friends that I know still care enough to lend a hand,” the Overlord watched the Swordmaster carefully.

“And who says we care enough?” the Swordmaster raised an eyebrow, clearly challenging the Overlord’s statement. The Corporal backed away, gnawing at the edge of his lip as he watched the Overlord and the Swordmaster take to the center of the dark room, both looking as stubborn as the other.

“I had hoped-” the Overlord began stiffly, but was cut off.

“Hoped. You’d hoped,” the Swordmaster echoed her sharply. The words stung like needles, but as the Overlord glanced back at her companions for help, she merely received the gentle nudge from the Theurgist. As she looked back at the Swordmaster, he continued, “I never served you. I always guided you. Maybe this is a battle that you need to guide yourself. I see nothing in it for me. Especially when I’m following YOU.”

“Come on. Prove to him that you’re worthy,” the Theurgist folded his arms sternly, “You know he thinks otherwise.”

The Overlord responded with a firm nod, drawing Kagi from its sheath and holding it out to the side in a semi-relaxed stance, “So you think I’m not good enough for your services? Don’t forget who defeated the Uberlord when you were inept, Matthew.” The comment seemed to sting the Swordmaster’s pride, a flare of anger rising in his eyes.

“You got lucky.”

“Then I’m damn lucky to be alive.”

“LANGUAGE!” the Advisor hissed from where she was standing off to the side.

The Swordmaster smirked, then challenged, “Fight me. Prove that you actually have what it takes. Because I’m not going to throw my life away for a worthless cause. Got it? Corporal!” The Corporal stepped up, loading a handgun with a round of bullets as he did so.

“Present!”

The Overlord glanced back at her friends, then called, “Soul-Keeper!” As the Soul-Keeper awkwardly stepped forward with a trail of toilet paper dangling from his left boot, he clasped his staff in both hands, the tip lit up so that he could see into the darkness of the cave. The Overlord shot two fireballs to either side of the room, the fire engraving lines to mark the edges of the makeshift battle arena. She took in a deep breath, then twirled her sword once, the light from the small fires that raged on either side reflected by her blade. “One dynamic duo versus the other,” the Overlord spoke moments before the Swordmaster lunged at her.

“I really don’t want to fight you...” the Soul-Keeper whined, dislodging the toilet paper from his shoe before firing a lightning spell at the Corporal. The Corporal ducked to the side, sending a spray of bullets at the Soul-Keeper. Lifting his staff into the air, the Soul-Keeper summoned a shield, wincing as the bullets cracked the white shield that engulfed him. With a spin of his staff, he sent the bullets straight back at the Corporal, who ducked behind a pillar of stone that supported the roof of the cave, and returned fire almost immediately.

“Pass the popcorn,” the Advisor, the Grasshopper, and Sexist were all sitting on the sideline, watching the fight as it proceeded. Sexist sat in the middle, a bowl of popcorn resting in his lap.

“HEY! Where’d you get that?” the Soul-Keeper called from the melee.

“Their pantry,” Sexist shrugged carelessly, then tossed a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

The Overlord and the Swordmaster had clashed blades and were going through some form of intricate set of battle moves. As the blades collided, the sparks that showered the ground almost seemed to add onto the deadly dance. The Overlord turned halfway, blocked the incoming sword with a quick block to her back, then continued turning, her other foot lashing out to catch the Swordmaster in the stomach. However, he hopped back, katana swishing down towards her unprotected foot. The Overlord’s leg moved in the nick of time, though she was off-balance. The Swordmaster pressed forward, stabbing and swiping at her unsteady feet. The Overlord backed towards the raging fire-wall, her breathing deep and yet out of its typical rhythm.

“Are you regretting this yet?” the Swordmaster asked cockily.

The Overlord responded with a careful flick of her wrist, sending his blade flying across the battle arena and nearly impaling the Soul-Keeper. “FINISH HIM!” the Grasshopper could be heard screaming over the roar of battle. As the Overlord made a move to strike, the Swordmaster brought out a second katana from its sheath near his hip, and blocked the move.

“Seriously?” the Overlord asked with a groan. Somewhere in the background, the Soul-Keeper had accidentally exploded a portion of the cave wall, much to the Corporal’s amusement. “This is ridiculous,” the Overlord added. “I don’t want to hurt you...” Her voice trailed off, fading into a small whisper, before adding in a more firm tone, “And I know you don’t want to hurt me.”

The Swordmaster’s eyes widened ever so slightly, his sword wavering in its stance. Watching him carefully, the Overlord allowed the tip of her katana to dip slightly, yielding. She waited- patient, but anxious as the Swordmaster’s dark eyes beared into hers. ‘Listen to reason,’ she begged silently, her breath contained within her tightly closed lips and halted within her. Her heart thumped, eyes choosing to ignore the melee in the background.

“Agreed...” the Swordmaster conceded rather reluctantly, “I’ll join your army. You’re a lot more persistent than I thought you’d be.”

“Of course I am,” the Overlord grinned, then backed away, lowering her sword. Waving a hand to the Soul-Keeper, she stopped him before he could electrocute the Corporal. “It’ll be good to have you two. God knows this army could use more... cynics.”

“Glad to oblige,” the Corporal called with a humored chuckle.


---

The interior of Fort Effort was not as deserted as the Twin had originally perceived. Ducking under the blade of an armored knight, the Twin sent a well-aimed kick to the back of the soldier’s leg, knocking him to the ground. Two chains shot forth from the walls, entangling the next soldier as Fish rounded the corner after the Twin.

“She runs so fast!” McCoy hollered over the clanging of blades. He held his machine gun in one hand, his other clasping his hat as he sprinted after Fish and the Twin. As the Twin skidded across the floor in an attempt to turn the corner, the entire building was thrashed with a tremor, sending a few of the lights crashing down. Fish grabbed a nearby DIB soldier corpse and hoist it over his head in time to block a light from slamming into him.

“That’ll be the outer wall,” Fish glanced at McCoy, “The Captain and the Lieutenant have really done it now!”

“Who says that was them?” a voice announced from behind both Fish and McCoy. Fish spun around, a clenched fist summoning a spiral of chains that shot forth at the white-garbed enemy. Pharisee’s staff knocked the chains away almost carelessly. His ringlets bounced as he laughed, his eyes lit with determination and amusement, “This is stupid. You’re all stupid. Don’t you even know what this fight is about?”

“Huh?” McCoy asked, glancing back to see if the Twin had returned. However, it appeared as though she’d moved on through the fort, most likely still looking for DIB’s generals. McCoy huffed a sigh, then turned to face Pharisee, machine gun at his side.

Pharisee’s brown eyes lined with crimson, his fingers gripping the handle of his staff to the point where his knuckles turned white. As the ends began to illuminate with magic, he answered, “Your stupid false lord? Do you wonder why she doesn’t show herself? She hides. She hides from us all because this war is over her soul. She fears DIB, as should you. Coward. Doesn’t even have the strength to face those who would vanquish her and purge her impurities from this universe.”

“You’re a poor, misguided soul...” Fish remarked, voice devoid of emotion.

“Heh. At least I have a soul, you mindless slave!” Pharisee’s jeer did little to affect the Underling. So, instead, he turned his gaze to McCoy. “And you. You traitorous little wretch. You’ll burn, too.”

“Fish. I’m rather sick of hearing this guy talk. Let’s shut him up,” McCoy loaded a round of bullets into his machine gun, a grin flickering on his features.

---



The Ninja-Lord had witnessed the explosion of the outer wall and could have only described it as ‘a sight to behold’. As the walls had begun crumbling, she had allowed Blondie to escape away from the falling chunks, if only out of mercy. A satisfied grin crossed her features as she lifted her katana into the air- a cry for victory sounding through the ANF army. Centurion Ifill had led the charge into the inner portions of the courtyard, her horse trampling over one of Blondie’s lieutenants. Seizing a pike from a fallen DIB soldier, she hurtled it at a fleeing footsoldier, screaming a war call.

“The battle is done, Blondie,” the Ninja-Lord turned and stared hard at where the wounded Blondie was grasping his shoulder and yet still clinging to his broadsword. A fleeting smile materialized upon her mouth, tiny but smug, “You’re done.”

“The Nemesis will kill me if I fall here...” Blondie panted, his bloodied shoulder hefting up his sword, “You’re not going to get a step past me.”

The Ninja-Lord’s expression darkened, “We’ll see.” A step, pivot, turn, and slash at the DIB general’s injured shoulder yielded a clumsy block. He was tiring, the former Insurgent giving in on his mediocre swordsmanship skills. ‘There was a reason I could always beat him,’ the Ninja-Lord thought triumphantly, twisting her torso around and catching him across his metal-plated back. Though her katana seemed to merely dent his armor, Blondie grunted, stumbled, and she snatched a single sai hidden in her belt. The fork-like weapon snagged Blondie’s cape as she impaled it straight into the earth, bouncing off from the momentum in time to dodge a heavy swing from Blondie’s sword. Though she was wounded from previous strikes against her, the Ninja-Lord found adrenaline was definitely on her side.

“You stupid bitch!” Blondie snarled in solid frustration, howling incoherently at the shadowy Ninja-Lord. Swinging and swiping at her with his sword, he didn’t even seem to care that he was missing her entirely. The Ninja-Lord danced around him nimbly, twirling her blade deftly. Ripping his cape, Blondie surged forward, his shoulder catching the Ninja-Lord’s collarbone. On instinct, she stabbed forward, the blade cutting into the area between his shoulder and chest plates, so deep that the tip of the sword protruded oddly out of his back.

“Die!” the Ninja-Lord hissed as she pulled her katana back and away from him, a shower of red droplets singeing the rusty turf. Blondie collapsed before the fallen gates of Fort Effort, his forehead dripping with sweat and silver armor painted crimson. The Ninja-Lord walked calmly past him, silent for the moment, before stopping and turning to look back at Blondie.

“Oh and... Blondie?”

As his weary head turned to look at her, vision fading in and out, the Ninja-Lord took one, victorious step past him.

“I passed you.”


---


“KVAAAATCH!” the Animal Tamer screamed at the top of her lungs, looking up at the darkened skies, “... I still think this is a bad idea, by the way.” Glancing at where the Witch was leisurely leaned back against the neck of her horse, the Animal Tamer frowned as the enchantress caught a nearby flying butterfly on fire. As the creature writhed in pain on the ground, the Witch cackled under her breath before sitting up.

“It’s about time. We’ve been going up this stupid hill for hours. I told you taking paths was overrated, but nooooo... Who listens to ME?” the Witch huffed in frustration.

“It just seems wrong plowing through everything,” the Evocator scratched the back of her neck apologetically. She frowned, eyes turned to the heavens, which pulsed with unnatural lightning and rumbled with demonic-sounding thunder. “And I think I agree with the Animal Tamer on this one. It just seems wrong to be here in general. The black clouds and red sky are just not doin’ it for me.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter either way. We’re here,” Jamie announced as the pathway leveled off to reveal...

... The ruins of a town, of which a large, gaping portal stood in front of, gleaming as an eye. Barricades were erect with trembling soldiers standing behind, swords drawn and gazes completely and utterly locked upon the portal. Jamie held her breath, unsure of what to say or do at the moment. As a small winged creature flew forth from the portal, a cry startled the soldiers into action. A bowstring was heartily drawn, an arrow fired, and a goblin-esque creature slain in one hit, the shaft hitting it through to where it resembled a shesh-ka-bob.

“... Well, this sucks,” the Witch commented dryly.

“So the town is overrun with monsters. Who’d have guessed it?” the Evocator shrugged, “So we find a NEW town to pilfer. Not too hard... There’s gotta be towns around, right? Other towns besides this one.”

“Well boo,” Jamie sighed, hanging her head. “Guess that means we gotta look elsewhere to get supplies...” Grabbing the reins to her horse, she began to descend back down the hill, looking rather downcast as she did. The Apprentice’s music altered to a more mello ‘Boulevard of Broken Dreams’ as Jamie passed her, setting the mood.

“Well... If I’m right, Skingrad isn’t too far from here,” the Scribe suggested, “Might we try there?”

“We’ll have to...” Jamie inclined her head with semi-enthusiasm. Thunder resounded through the wilderness, causing the stolen horses to stir uncomfortably. Jamie ran her hand down her stallion’s nose, calming him down with a small ‘shush’. “... Em’s counting on us.”